Cooter pains

This Wednesday I was consistently plagued with what we call “cooter pains.”  This is the out-of-nowhere, sudden stabbing pain that shoots through your cervix, down your vagina and often all the way down your leg.  Much like an electrical shock.  It feels like the baby has just kicked his foot right down your vagina and then is inside, cackling maniacally.  Since most babies are head down at this point, they can’t possibly be kicking you in the cervix.  It’s more like they’ve got a long pirate sword and are repeatedly stabbing you at the most opportune moments.  Like when you’re standing in line at the grocery store.  Next time you see a pregnant woman suddenly double over in pain, say to her: “Oh man, stabbing sensations in the cervix and vagina, eh?  Poor thing.”  She will be amazed with your experience and knowledge. 

Anyway, I am convinced that these pains can be attributed to the first signs of dilation.  As much as I love to think about the cervix opening slowly and gently like a blooming rosebud, it just isn’t true.  It’s a good mind trick, because really, you don’t want to be imagining that pirate sword when you’re trying to relax and “open, open open.”

Wednesday night (Thursday morning?) around midnight, I woke up to intense menstrual like cramping, followed with sporadic contractions that were anywhere from 2-12 minutes apart.  At this point, I’m not stupid.  Any contractions that don’t come in regular intervals don’t get me excited whatsoever.  I tried to doze between contractions, but that damn intermittent cramping had me rolling up in the fetal position, which made things even worse.  I finally got out of bed and I was up.  FOR THE NIGHT.  Auugh!  That crap lasted well into the morning when it finally subsided and I crashed out on the couch while Rylan watched cartoons for a large majority of the day. 

I’ve now had a good night’s sleep and am ready to face another day of random pain that appears to have no purpose whatsoever.  I’ve woken up to more mucus plug, which is always a joyous occasion and apparently not embarassing to me at all, since I share this information freely with anyone who asks me how I’m doing. 

More exciting information to follow about my fascinating bodily functions.  Is anyone still listening?

3 comments November 7, 2008

Now we wait.

Things are getting done.  It is somehow being taken care of.  I don’t know why I ever stress that things won’t happen, because they always do.  This is the life we are priveleged to live.  There have been times during the last ten years when things were so bad financially, that there seemed to be no possible way out.  And then, miraculously, we’d receive a check in the mail for this, that or the other.  Rebates, refunds, unexpected tax returns, a raise, a promotion.  A few months ago I literally had a list of our upcoming expenses that filled an entire sheet of notebook paper.  Some of these needs were small, such as “boys need haircuts” and some were large, such as “fill oil tank for winter heat.”  As of the 27th of this month, every single item on my list will be crossed off.  I have everything I truly need for the baby, including the small luxury of a baby bathtub, which I assumed I would do without.  My midwife will be paid for her services and she will be paid on time.  My pets will have made their trips to the vet and due to the super low price of gas, my oil tank will be filled with enough heat to last us the winter.  Yes, we’ve had to make sacrifices for these things to happen.  I’ve had to make two humiliating trips to the food bank.  Brent has had to work until his body has felt as if it will give up.  He has had to religiously take medication that makes him nauseous and gives him insomnia, in order to give up the smoking habit that has plagued him since we were kids.  When my minivan broke down for good, I had to learn to drive a huge truck that is impossible to park and difficult to maneuver and makes me want to cry as I attempt to get my enormous pregnant self into the driver’s seat and as I struggle to secure my 3 year old into his carseat.  Nevertheless, it has all happened and I am so proud, so thankful and much less stressed.  *Huge sigh of relief* Now we just wait for the baby.  Just waiting, waiting, waiting.

4 comments November 5, 2008

My very scientific mathematical equation

I stepped on the scale this morning.  I promised myself I wouldn’t do it again during pregnancy, since my midwife has stopped weighing me and there really isn’t any point to it whatsoever.  But I was dying of curiosity.  I’ve now officially gained 55lbs.  I gained 65lbs with Pregnancy #1, 65lbs with Pregnancy #2 and 60lbs with Pregnancy #3.  I guarantee you that I will hit 60lbs before I deliver Baby #4.  This means that with my average weight gain of 2lbs per week, this child will not be born for at least another 2 1/2 weeks.  Is that totally scientific or what? LOL.  Well, that’s my estimate anyway.  And I’ve pretty  much convinced myself, because now I’m a total slacker and have started flat-out refusing to do any kind of nesting.  Instead, Rylan and I have been hanging out.  I plan to spend the next few weeks with my CURRENT baby before he becomes the Big Boy.  Yesterday we went for a walk around the neighborhood, as we’ve been doing lately when it isn’t raining. 

P.S.  It would also be completely acceptable for this baby to be born today, the day in which America elects its first black president.  Because that is actually happening today.  Right?!?!

2 comments November 4, 2008

Rylan’s 3rd birthday

Yesterday we celebrated Rylan’s birthday.  He made sure to wear his Halloween costume to show off to everyone.  There were SO many presents.  It was like Christmas.  My kids are spoiled rotten!  Rylan got a new Brio train track, wooden toys and puzzles, some clothes and some Diego toys, which he played with for at least 4 hours straight yesterday.  Everyone was so generous, which we were so grateful for, since we were only able to buy Rylan a few things for his birthday.  (Jelly beans–his favorite candy.  Gum–promised to him once he turned three, but may have to be held off for another year since he cannot seem to understand the concept of chewing without swallowing.  Spiderman underwear–also promised to him when he turned three.  $5 wooden puzzle.  Rubber boots–a necessity in every size for all children living and playing in the Northwest.) 

This is what happens when you ask your husband to take pictures, but you get the general idea:

From left to right: Tristan, Aidan (Rylan the Pirate) and my brother Dave. 

We had a Diego birthday cake.  Go Diego Go!

And here is the only picture that will EVER exist of my sister-in-law and I, pregnant at the same time.  She’s about 25 weeks along.  That’s my nephew in there!!!

3 comments November 3, 2008

37 weeks

I’m full term!  I did it! I did it! I did it!  I’m totally cleared for homebirth!

Brent and I “did the deed” last night after about ohhhhhh 8 months without.  It gave me raging contractions that radiated into my back and seriously felt like someone was cracking my spine in half.  That lasted for most of the night, which was quite lovely.  They finally began to subside and I passed out, only to have to get up to pee four more times and wake up to a cat’s ass in my face.   Now I’m guzzling coffee (yes, caffeine during pregnancy, ack!) and getting ready to prepare for the entire family to be here in a few hours to celebrate Rylan’s 3rd birthday.  I. Am. A. Zombie.  No more sex during pregnancy.  It’s evil.

2 comments November 2, 2008